There is nothing ‘normal’ about abusers
In an recent email post I sent about the Christmas party massacre by Bruce Pardo, I tried to convey that the assailant did not fit any sterotype of a pathological murder. No record and apparently recorded mental health issues.
it does illustrate how desperation can lead a ‘normal’ person to commit an incredibly heinous act. While we do not have a full psychological profile of Pardo, he reportedly had a clean record, no history of violence and was active in his church.
The reference to normal generated a number of responses, including one that I have from a colleague who gave me permission to include a part of his response-
I appreciated your letter, but I think you’ve inadvertently supported a couple common myths about domestic violence. Calling him “normal” is on the same continuum as the media coverage that portrays him as a “nice guy,” when apparently he wasn’t. And speaking about the stress of job loss and finances begs the reader to confirm the myth that job stress, or any kind of stress (loss of the dog, etc.) or poor coping skills, causes DV. What I’ve been taught is that one person (usually a man) having a mindset that s/he gets to control the person s/he’s dating or married to, causes DV. Stress can make that dynamic worse, but my understanding is that it’s not the cause.
Certainly such stresses should be taken into consideration in any threat assessment, as you suggest. But the stresses are not the cause - they just make it worse.
His contact information, again, with permission-
Ben Atherton-Zeman, Maynard, MA USA
Actor, Comedian, Feminist and Husband
Presenting a One-Man Play: “Voices of Men,” http://www.voicesofmen.org
Booking information: 978-897-3619
I may have used a poor choice of words but certainly there is nothing ‘normal’ about this man. I was trying to address another myth that those who commit homicide are these noticiably deranged characters.
Another point that I failed to emphasize is that the stressors the he faced can be seen a correlations, not causal to the action. I am not sure if I can get far if I tried to get “into the minds” of the perpetrators I have studied to anaylyse their motives or determine why they do what they do.
What we can do is take an objective look at what is going on their world and notice the risk factors that have been associated with such extreme behavior.
But also known is the myriad of problems and losses that he faced. The massacre occurred less than a week before the divorce was finalized. He had apparently lost his electrical engineering job just months before which complicated his financial struggles.
“I was not given a severance package from my last employer at termination and I am not receiving any other income,” wrote Pardo, who also was denied unemployment benefits. “I am desperately seeking work.”
Among those, his previous girlfriend had sued him for the $340,000 in medical bills from an accident which left his 9 year old son brain damaged bound to a wheel chair. The guilt of this incident may have added to his mental torment as the condition was a result of a pool accident when he was watching the child. As a final, very personal loss, as part of the recent divorce, he lost his Akita dog, Saki, to whom he was known to be very attached.
The main issue is that I do not try to suggest that abusers who commit murder are just normal men under pressure. There are deeper issues that is the subject of many books and message boards. But if there are any lessons that can be applied, it is in looking at cases broadly and recognizing factors that may make them more likely to kill.
Comments are welcomed